Quick Food Review: A real life Kitchen Nightmare!!

WRETCHED FOOD ALERT: Paris Seafood Cafe – La Perouse, Sydney.

“I feel like they’ve just reached into my wallet and stolen my money!”

storiesbyphil POSTER foodComing out of the bathroom at this place, I overheard the cooks angrily telling off a customer who had the temerity to complain about their food.

“Well if you don’t like the food, we’ll give you your money back. Why do you have to say this in front of our customers? There’s nothing wrong with your food. You’re an idiot. Go away! We don’t want your business.”

It was like a scene from Gordon Ramsey’s TV show ‘Kitchen Nightmares’! I went back to our table, apprehensive.

“I got a bad feeling about this place,” I told my girlfriend. She pointed at our water glasses. They were filthy. Oh, great.

So, in this outdated, uninspiring fish & chip shop we waited, and waited, fearing the worst…

…and our fears weren’t disappointed.

When the food came out, I was aghast! It was piled (and I do mean PILED) 6 inches high off the plate! You might think, “Great serving size!”

Wrong, it was awful.

20150829_144256The grilled barramundi tasted off. One side was so rock hard it looked like the seafood delivery truck had backed over it a couple of times. Underneath that piece of roadkill, was a gigantic heap of boring salad drizzled with some tasteless dressing. Buried still beneath THAT, were some french fries cooked in oil that must have been squeezed from Moses’ olives 2000 years ago! My stomach turned.

My poor girlfriend fared no better. If the overcooked garlic prawns on her plate had not already been dead, they would have drowned in the swimming pool of oil and limp spinach they sat in. We quickly left after a few bites, a horrible taste in both our mouths.

“I’d rather eat the cardboard box a Big Mac comes in than eat another bite of that sh#t.”

That was DEFINITELY the first and LAST time we go to the PARIS SEAFOOD CAFE.

Oh my, and that name!

Don’t get me started…


And in case you don’t believe me, have a look on TripAdvisor…


Quick Food Review: Kepos Street Kitchen

We found this little gem of a restaurant, Kepos Street Kitchen, through TripAdvisor while passing through Redfern (Sydney, Australia). People and tables are packed in pretty tight, but it was worth the claustrophobia. It’s light, clean and friendly.
There are lots of people on TripAdvisor who ordered the salad with the lamb cigars. The name alone is intriguing, but we went against the grain and ordered something else. Thankfully, we weren’t disappointed
kepos kitchen storiesbyphil 21. WOOD-FIRED SMOKED SALMON SALAD. Maybe the best salad I’ve ever had! With green olives, kipflers, a soft boiled egg and dukkah, it is not only HEALTHY but DELICIOUS.
2. SOUTHERN FRIED CHICKEN SANDWICH. I’m from the South in the US, so I was skeptical they could pulls this off, but I tip my hat. It was a fusion of America and the Middle East, with a tangy coleslaw and chermoula marinade, and it was DELICIOUS, too. A bit greasy compared to my girlfriend’s healthy salad, but worth an extra trip to the gym.
The place gets very busy, even during the week (we went on a Thur), so get there early, or late. Parking on the residential streets behind the restaurant is free and relatively gettable, i.e. you don’t need to catch a bus there. You also don’t need to steal your grandmother’s silverware to pay for a meal. By Sydney standards, it was reasonable, considering the quality. Two meals (no drinks) for $36.